Generation Y

I turned 30 a few months back.

As long as one is in his 20s somewhere deep inside is the feeling that you are still the "in- thing". Every 2 wheeler, deodorant, electronic gadget and fashion waala makes his saucy, exciting and outrageous ads with you in mind. You love calling uncles and aunties old fashioned. You fume and fret about the ‘Generation Gap!’.

But then one fine day your 30th Birthday dawns and I dunno about others but man I felt like a huge sledgehammer crashed into that internal mirror in which I used to fancy myself as "THE IN-THING". I desperately rechecked my receding hairline and protruding belly both of whom unfortunately agreed that I was indeed one of those "Uncles" that I thought I would never be.

Friends who turned 30 before me wished me with sadistic grins and mouthed stuff like "30 is the the new 20 yaar!", "Its not the age, its the mileage dude!", "Chicks dig matured guys man!". This got me thinking. When exactly does one begin to feel the mental symptoms of aging? Is it gradual? Or it happens just like I felt one fine day .... BAM!

Ofcourse according to the calendar it happens just one unsuspectingly fine day. But I would like to think, the moment one begins to reject new things and ideas or sticks to time tested conventions and notions the process of aging begins. Ofcourse many people in their 30s are very open to trying new stuff, adept at tackling the latest electronic gadgets, discussing late night shows on MTV or Bindaas or plainly lusting about the latest hottie in Bollywood or women’s tennis. But these are deep topics … I am not qualified to comment on them.

I just wanted to feel young! I do indulge in occasional retail therapy so my way to express the youthful vivacity bouncing out of every ounce of flab I had gathered in my 3 decades on this planet was to buy a new pair of jeans. Now again I could be biased but the kind of jeans youngsters prance about in today spells complete fashion disaster for me. I do not want my jeans torn! I do not want my jeans embroidered with dragon motifs! I do not want my jeans to have more than 2 pockets in the back! I do not want my jeans to look any different than what old man Levi Strauss wanted!

But then smugly I realized that my age had after all come to my rescue! None of the crazy designs would be available in SIZE 38!!! So who’s the man now, huh?!

I sauntered into the denim store and the young kid manning the denim section quickly sized me up and showed me some extremely expensive but very safe denims. By safe I mean none of the afore mentioned fashion experiments had been conducted on the jeans yet! I was elated as I took two of them into the trial rooms, bursting with anticipation at the picture of coolness that awaited me in the mirrors!

So I did what everybody does in the trial room and saw myself from the front. All well, hands sliding in smoothly into the front pockets, ample space for the phone, cigarette packet and keys. Good! Then I turned back. Something was not right, but I couldn’t figure it out. As I stooped to slip on my sandals I realized to my horror that I cant be caught dead wearing these jeans!!!

As I stooped again to check if what I saw was not a figment of my twisted imagination. There from above the waist band of my brand new pair of jeans was my not so very young butt crack happily smiling back at me. It was not a pretty sight ass you might imagine.

I quickly changed into my faithful old jean and smiled at the expectant young lad outside the trial room and said “This pair is for Generation Y, you got something for old timers like me?”

Wanna know what is Generation Y? Take a look!